Monday, June 27, 2011

Garden of Creation

Abandon the desires of the heart no more

Rid me of the impurity of my demons

Capture my soul and take me in

The Depth of thy purpose yet unknown

Escaping the destruction from within

Running wild against the wind

Alas, Freedom to unlock the gates

To the garden of Creation

~KA Faulk

note to self: damn I needed a poetry fix

Sunday, June 26, 2011

Open Journal

At times I find it hard to understand myself but yet I make so much sense! I've stayed awake many nights trying to figure out my life and you know what I think I'll just leave that up to the BIG guy! I admire people who are so easy going and at ease with life. I find my brain at times works overboard, have you ever felt like that? You wish you could catch up with your brain? There is no rhyme or reason to theroll coaster ride in my head at times. That is when I take a deep breath relax and remember to BREATHE.

I'm just rambling today since I've resigned myself to the fact that I write my blogs for taking an inventory of my thoughts and life. Yes, you are open to my Daily Journal! I sort of feel naked at times and at other times I feel hidden. I guess in some small way I wish to contribute to society through my crazy thoughts, does that make sense? At times I make no sense at all and at others I find myself too sensible.

Note to self: writing with pen in hand can be good also! "Paper is more patient than man

Saturday, June 25, 2011

My Friend's AA Birthday Card - Written by Me

I can't take credit for this wonderful peice of art, but I wish to share the website
Something about the work speaks to my soul, BRAVO to your work I adore your pieces Pomegranate!

Letter to Friend: (She has 11 Years of Sobriety)
On this special day Remember; Never abandon your Dreams for they are the foundations of YOUR SOUL.
If God brings you to it, He will bring you through it, just as he has carried you, held your hand, and stroked your hair.
Isaiah 43:2 “When you go through deep waters, I will be with you. When you go through rivers of difficulty, you will not drown, when you walk through the fire of oppression you will not be burned up; the flames will not consume you”
"Remember: It's ok to look back and see how far you have come, just don’t stare.”
Serenity is not the absence of conflict, but the ability to cope with it as you are molding your Serenity and Peace each and every day like an artist perfects his strokes.
"Remember; don't run so fast that your guardian angel can't keep up"
I will always be here for you, through the rivers of difficulty and the JOYS OF THE SUN. I see so much beauty inside you that is still waiting to come out. God is still molding you into HIS MASTERPIECE and HE is amazed and in AWE OF YOU.
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU! Thank you for always being here for me and the girls, you are the BIG SISTER I look up to.

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Walk Through The Hurt and The Pain - Not As We, As Me

Alanis Morissette - Not As We

Reborn and shivering
Spat out on new terrain

Unsure unconvincing
This faint and shaky hour

Day one day one start over again
Step one step one
I'm barely making sense for now
I'm faking it 'til I'm pseudo making it
From scratch begin again but this time I as i
And not as we

Gun shy and quivering
Timid without a hand

Feign brave with steel intent
little and hardly here

Day one day one start over again
Step one step one
with not much making sense just yet
I'm faking it til I'm pseudo making it
From scratch begin again but this time I as i
And not as we

Eyes wet toward
Wide open frayed
If God's taking bets
I pray He wants to lose

Day one day one start over again
Step one step one
I'm barely making sense just yet
I'm faking it til I'm pseudo making it
From scratch begin again but this time I as I
And not as we

Link To Video

These lyrics means so very much to me, especially now that I'm recovering from neck surgery. I have started over so many times in my life drifting from bad memories to present and not making sense at all. I have been haunted from the past, "AS WE" resembles that dark child for me, as you can see in the video she is stroking herself this symbolizes the dark child. I'm not sure how many times I've been faced with dreadful thoughts and pains that no human being should have to go through. I never truly saw myself as a victim or martyr I felt like a Warrior or a Survivor. Many times I was lost, but God always FOUND ME, or should I say I found GOD AGAIN, and AGAIN.

You can't run from pain, you have to face it head on and walk through it. Oh my, how long has it taken me to realize this? GOD is the only ONE who has shown me this, but I'm grateful God sends us these wonderful people called HUMAN ANGELS. My human angel is my husband who has stood by my side through the trials and the tribulations, the highs and the lows, the sadness and the happiness. He made me realize I have to FACE it and he was right there with me holding my hand and God was holding the other one.
I have so much gratitude for MY LIFE exactly where I AM. God knows our hearts and he knows them so well.

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